Friday, October 21, 2005

Now, I'm really gonna sing!

Is it possible to have missed God's perfect will? Let me explain...

I recall the day as if it were moments ago. Truly, it was one of the first big "God" moments of my life. The first of many, might I add.

There I was, kneeling at my bed, Bible open, needing an answer to the question, "Why am I here?" I was a new Christian and only 16 years old. I felt as if my life were a mistake and wondered what purpose there was for me. I was saved now and going to Heaven. What was God waiting for? I wanted to go right then, but I knew I'd have to wait. I said, "Lord, I am Your servant. Tell me what You want me to do with my life."

Though the Bible was open, I had not yet chosen a passage to read. At the end of my prayer, I looked down and saw Colossians 3:16, "Let the Word of Christ richly dwell within you, with all wisdom teaching and admonishing one another with psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, singing with thankfulness in your hearts to God." That was it! Before I got saved, I had the typical adolescent fantasy of being a singer, or playing in a band. I wanted to sing like the masters, Barry Manilow, Tom Jones, Dean Martin, and of course, Frank Sinatra. When they sang, it was from their gut. No cheesy falsetto with these men.

So that was my answer. I was to sing for Jesus. Though I had never sung in public in my life, I auditioned for the musical, "The Witness," at my church. My audition was probably the worse anyone had ever heard. I couldn't sight read and had no musical training, except singing at home into the mirror. Miraculously, I got the lead part of Peter. Scared to death doesn't begin to capture my emotional roller coaster prior to the event. I never actually threw up, as I've heard that some singers do before a performance, but I sure could have.

When the musical was over, I don't remember anything except a huge sense of relief, and Pastor Davis hugging me. After that moment, I felt as if I were right in the center of God's will. Talk about a "happy place." That was it. Singing the Lord's praise was/is my happy place.

Then why did my life's journey take me into the preaching ministry? Am I a singer who sometimes preaches, or a preacher who sometimes sings? Did I miss God's perfect will by choosing to take the educational path of Bible exegesis and preaching? I thought I had until I read the verse again this morning.

"Let the WORD (emphasis mine) of Christ richly dwell in you, teaching and admonishing...(THEN) singing..."

God has meticulously led me on a journey of building a solid biblical foundation. And although I have "renounced" my Southern Baptist roots, I do not believe I'd have received the quality Bible education I got from anywhere else. Along the way, there have been life lessons and experiences that I'd have chosen to avoid (given such a choice).

Mix it all up, add a little jazz, and you have a 37 year old husband and father who no longer pastors, but still preaches and sings (or sings and preaches). I am writing songs every day, and we'll see what the Lord does with them. Maybe they're just for me to sing to Him. Maybe He'll let me share them with you. One of my original songs was recorded in 2002. I will try to figure out a way to get a link/stream or whatever, if anyone actually wants to hear it.

Where it goes from here is gonna be one fun ride.
Post a Comment